"Though only days have gone by, I have suddenly received unexpected benevolence"

Thanks to Vishen's 7 Sacred States Challenge, I realized what I lost with my divorce in 2008. Since then life has been a struggle, raising 7 kids alone, fighting for child support while working 125%. At the same time, I was trying to improve myself. I started meditating, went into treatment and eventually treated myself to a year of Mindvalley, which was all I could afford at the time. Despite all this, it was not until this challenge that I realized that I had lost, and not regained my Faith in the universe and had blocked Receptivity. I deemed myself unworthy of receiving due to some actions I took after my divorce that I was ashamed of. They do not go hand in hand with the identity I hold for myself and I could not reconcile the differences, excuse or forgive myself even though these actions hurt noone except my own self image. I was living in fear someone would find out and judge me. I am now in the process of releasing this shame and guilt. My first breakthrough started day 2, the day we discussed Faith. Despite all I've done to rebuild my life I realized I still hadn't returned to truely believing the universe is benevolent as I had up until my divorce. I had always believed in my intuition and had Faith the right things would come at the right time. After the divorce, I slowly returned to believe everything happened for a reason and even could see how my life was better in some ways, than before. However, only during this challenge did I realize I had closed myself off from receiving by holding on to shame, feeling unworthy and believing I did not deserve good things anymore. Though only days have gone by, I have suddenly received unexpected benevolence. My dad suddenly remembered he had meant to gift me $5000 last May and sent the money to me, which enabled me to help my son who just got married in September and my daughter who just had her first child 2 months ago. Then, the day before an important workshop, I received a free ticket though the event was sold out long ago. There I met a friend who connected me to an important person who asked me to make an appointment to speak together to aid me in moving towards my professional goals. Two days after the challenge, two significant events that show how powerful the 7 Sacred States are and how quickly the universe can respond when we are in sinc! Thank you Vishen!